Your Body is Not the Problem. Society is.

So many of us think about the parts of our bodies that we would like to change. It doesn’t help that we are bombarded with messages both subliminally and overtly in our technology-laden world and part of a culture that is grossly superficial.

I’m a firm believer in the following statement:
“Love the body you have, so you can have the body you love.”

By that I mean if you are making dietary changes and increasing your physical activity because you want to look a certain way, you’re doing it wrong.

Believe me, I did it. If you want to live a healthy lifestyle that includes taking care of your body, nourishing it properly and giving it the movement it needs, then you will reap many benefits– both physical and psychological.

However, if you are looking to achieve your “dream body,” because you feel that once that happens, the rest of your life will just fall into place, then my friend I’m sorry to say you have a long road of dissatisfaction and longing ahead.

Exercise should not be a punishment for the food you eat. And eating should not be seen as sinful or something to feel guilty about. We all need food which is comprised of nutrients that help our bodies and minds function to their highest potential. Some foods are more nutrient rich (fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean meats, nuts, and seeds) . Other foods are more energy-rich (Sugary foods, fried foods). Some foods are both nutrient and energy rich (Avocados, nuts, fatty fish, olive oil). A healthy diet is comprised of a combination of these types of foods, with most foods being nutrient-rich with a few energy-rich foods interspersed.

My wish for everyone I care about (which is basically everyone I meet) is that we learn to love the bodies we have. They are the only bodies we’ve ever had, and we will never have a different one. Once we learn to love the vessel in which we live, then we will treat it with respect. From looking at ourselves from a standpoint of respect and love, we will appreciate all that it can do, and we will find joy in strengthening it, challenging it physically and providing it proper nutrition.

I urge everybody to refrain from talking negatively about their bodies. It promotes our culture of superficiality and further supports the notion that we must all strive to achieve something that may not even be within our genetics to achieve. Instead, be the bolder person and say something positive about your body. Everyone has something. Help me be part of a movement that challenges the norm of negative body-talk as an impetus for change. Let’s promote a culture of individuals who live balanced lifestyle because we care about ourselves.

 

 

Follow your dreams

I was one of the fortunate people who, at a young age, knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life. Although the journey wasn’t at all a smooth one, now I am grateful for every moment because it lead me to where I am now.

From the age of 15, I knew I wanted to be a Registered Dietitian. Today, that dream came true when I passed my RD exam. For those of who you don’t know exactly what a Registered Dietitian is, please, let me briefly explain:

RDs are nutrition experts who have a 4-year bachelor of science degree in nutritional sciences/dietetics. Some have advanced degrees. Beyond obtaining a degree, the training includes a rigorous unpaid internship that provides experience in various settings. Upon graduating said internship, you are eligible for an exam administered by the Commission on Dietetic Registration. Once you pass the exam, you become an RD. RDs are more than nutritionists. Anyone who uses Google and has an interest in nutrition can be a nutritionist. Dietitians undergo training in food service, management, clinical settings (hospitals, long term care), and community settings.

My journey to becoming an RD truly began when I was an overweight 12-year-old. I was one of those children health professionals directed their gazes towards when they came into classrooms and warned us about the dangers of childhood obesity. To combat being marginalized, I took it upon myself to lose weight and live a healthier life.

Several years down the road, as my body image waxed and waned, “eating right” and exercising became a real struggle for me. It felt less like a balanced lifestyle and more like an unhealthy addiction. Eventually, I was diagnosed with an eating disorder. With the help of an excellent medical team (including a dietitian), I began to understand the life-sustaining aspects of food. This is when I knew exactly what I wanted to do with my life. I wanted to learn the science behind nutrients, understand their importance, and share what I learned with other people who struggled the same way I had.

In the midst of my confusion with what was going on with my body, my mom suffered a massive heart attack. I remember a dietitian in the hospital having spoken to her. I was already aware of the aspects of a heart-healthy diet, but this was when I realized that the job of a dietitian is not easy: some patients are non-compliant and do not respectfully consider the advice of a dietitian (my mom, for instance). Regardless, my dream lived on.

When I finally started college, I felt a bit discouraged because I was not accepted to Penn State’s main campus, but instead was accepted to the branch campus in Erie. The feelings of discouragement subsided when I began taking courses that interested me, however I truly struggled from a social aspect. I met a few outstanding people, but I was overwhelmingly surrounded by shallow people who bullied me (who would’ve thought that bullying would be an issue in college?!) and purposely excluded me. Honestly, it was an awful two years, but I could not let go of the idea of being an RD.

Finally, I made it to Penn State’s main campus and finished my degree. During the internship application season (fall semester of senior year), everyone was on edge, because the next step was to get “matched” to an internship program, some of which did not have promising acceptance rates. Most people applied to several programs; I applied to one– the only one that was financially possible for me to attend, although it was the one that appealed to me the most anyway, for reasons other than money.

I was accepted to the internship and was beyond ecstatic, but several weeks after the program began, I grew extremely depressed and I struggled academically. The program director even called me and advised me to consider whether or not I belong in the program. At this point, I was devastated. Yes, I struggled more than anticipated, but my mental health problems have never before so strongly affected my academic/professional success. I spent the rest of the internship with barely existent self-esteem and felt as if I was walking on eggshells, constantly questioning whether or not I belonged there.

Well, I obviously graduated from the internship, (thank you to those of you who believed in me) and I even got my first job out of it.

3 months after graduating from the internship, I passed my RD exam and am now a registered dietitian. It’s been a long road and there have been bumps and massive potholes along the way, but the important thing is to keep your dreams alive. Ask yourself what it is that you REALLY want to do. You may have days, months, or years in which you feel like it will never come to you, but it’s up to you to keep revisiting that vision you have of yourself and allowing yourself the freedom to explore it.

I Don’t Care if the World Knows What My Secrets Are

I guess at what normal behavior is.
I have difficulty following a project through from beginning to end.
I lie when it would be just as easy to tell the truth.
I judge myself without mercy.
I have difficulty having fun.
I take myself very seriously.
I have difficulty with intimate relationships.
I over-react to changes over which I have no control.
I constantly seek approval and affirmation.
I usually feel like I’m different from other people.
I’m either super responsible or super irresponsible.
I’m extremely loyal, even in the face of evidence that the loyalty is undeserved.
I’m impulsive.

There you go, folks.

Nine Months to the NOW

That was an absolutely beautiful post!

I am also in recovery from an eating disorder, and my mom was in your shoes when I was an infant. Your determination, love, and gratitude is so touching! ❤

McCall Dempsey

Up until today, this blog has been dedicated to my eating disorder recovery journey, my experiences as the proud founder of Southern Smash and the extraordinary people I’ve met and the events along the way. Traveling through the depths of an eating disorder and into the life of recovery puts life in perspective. Seemingly simple life events are richer and colors bolder. The sunshine on your face is warmer and you can’t help but soak in the freedom in each breath and the peace in your mind.

And while my blog will continue to chronicle my journey, my beautiful life just took a very unexpected turn. At 26-weeks pregnant with my second child, I experienced Preterm Premature Rupture of Membranes (pProm). Essentially, the amniotic sac that protects and houses my sweet baby girl tore and I began leaking amniotic fluid at 1:30pm Monday, September 29. My life, my family’s life changed…

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Free Write/Back Into the Saddle Again

I began this blog last Summer for something to put on my resume, but I blurred the lines between what’s professional and “too personal,” so when it came time to make a professional resume, I decided to not include the hyperlink to this page on it. 

To be perfectly honest, this post doesn’t even have a specific point to prove or agenda. I’m literally sitting in my apartment above Cafe 210 in downtown State College, blasting “Waking Up to Love” by Shanna Crooks and free-writing. Disclaimer: it probably will most likely just be me blabbing about myself, but I’ll sparkle it with linguistically beautiful words and sophisticated literary and scientific language that you can lose yourself in. 

I recently noticed how often I have a difficult time understanding what’s appropriate or not appropriate. Take personal space, for example. I’m good with giving people personal physical space, but not personal space with regards to their possessions. I never had a “don’t-touch-that-because-it’s-mine” attitude. Some people do; some people don’t, and it’s all okay. The scared little child piece of my soul fears judgement from others, and it warns you all to see that my delayed understanding of appropriate behavior is not in any way malicious or aggressive, but is just slow to warm up.

As I listen to this song with the following lyrics attached to it, I can’t help but think about the last time I was truly myself– when I was 16, it was spring time, and everyone around me was spiritually connected because they were helping me recover from nutritional entropy (does anyone get the Bo Burnham reference? 😛 ).

“Well, it’s time for a change/
Throwing all those sad, sad songs away
Today

I won’t let the sunshine go to waste no way, No
‘Cause I can feel my heart beating for the very first time 
Everything around me starts falling in line
I feel alive, so alive
I just can’t hide.
But something changed me, changed me, changed me 
‘Cause lately, lately, lately I’ve been

Waking up to love
Every morning I’ve been
Waking up to love”

Springtime had always been my favorite because of the relative prevalence of warmth and sunshine in South/Midwest Pennsylvania. It brought the bright colors of the flower form of the Chaenomeles shrub that grew in my parents’ backyard; a type of hot pink with a hint of coral. I admit, pink is my all-time favorite color 🙂

Lol, I’d apologize there’s no point to this post– but I already forewarned you! 😛 But, my stomach started growling (so cool, right)? For those of y’all who don’t understand the “cool” reference, I’m alluding to the fact that my satiety signals are properly functioning, because struggling with an eating disorder for 10 years screws up the instant messaging between the brain and the stomach. That instant messaging system is what causes the “growling” in your stomach, which also stimulates appetite. AKA I’m hooongry and free Qdoba is downstairs. 

Peace out, nerd scouts!

Anonymous Compliments

Everyone loves a good compliment, right? I designed this little project to share some positive energy and to encourage the flow of kind thoughts in order to give us all (me, included!) a break from negative thinking. I’ll admit, when I’m stressed or haven’t slept enough, I can be pretty cynical, and especially under these conditions, my brain defaults to downer thoughts (thank you, depression). I do, however, know that when I compliment someone, or when someone compliments me, I feel better. I told myself I wanted to compliment people more– strangers, friends, acquaintances, and anyone in between. I also knew that setting a vague goal for myself, like “giving more compliments,” wouldn’t be the most effective method of achieving said goal; I needed something a little more in-your-face and concrete. 

So, I came up with this idea:

The “jar” is actually an empty Folger’s coffee container (if you couldn’t tell :-P), and the explanation is written on the inside of one of a million unused Thank You cards I have sitting around the apartment. I decided to put this “jar” in my place of work– Qdoba! Over Christmas Break, my boss purchased a community board, which had only 2 random flyers on it. Why not make use of the board, help myself achieve my goal of giving more compliments, encouraging others to do the same, and spread some positive vibes in the process?

 

The little colored slips of paper on which people write their anonymous compliments were actually just divider pages separating all the documents sent from the copy center to the lab I work in. Instead of throwing them away, I used them for my little personal community project! 

So… most of these were written by my coworkers and their friends, BUT there are a few compliments from actual customers! At least it adds some personality to our store and fosters kind thinking, at least to some extent!

The two in the middle were actually written by customers. The majority of the board at this point is anonymous compliments to Qdoba employees, which wasn’t my intention; it was to get people to compliment anyone! Did I not explain it well on my little directions card? Oh well, the overlying purpose was to spread some positive vibes, and I think I accomplished that.

The compliment at the top of this picture is one I wrote for a specific customer. He always orders his food very politely, and takes the time to ask each of us on the serving line how we are doing on that particular day. It’s kind of difficult to be cynical when you come across someone well-mannered and thoughtful. I also wrote it to remind myself that the simple act of interacting with someone polite can relieve stress, which encourages me to speak more politely and take the time to ask someone how their day is going. I feel as though with our generation, our sense of community is disappearing; technology replaces human interaction. I, too, am at fault of this!… another reason why I do these little community-building things– to force me to positively interact with other people.

In order to encourage more customers to participate, I was thinking of putting the names of those who participate in a drawing to win a Qdoba gift card. However, this might take away the anonymity of the compliments, because I’d at least need the name and e-mail address of whomever participates so I can contact them if they win. I also don’t want people not participating and just providing contact info for the drawing. Any suggestions?

8 Nutrients to Boost Your Spirits – Nutrient #5

NutriFocus

FOLATE

• Folate is also known as B9 or Folic Acid
• Folate helps the body create new cells and regulate serotonin (Serotonin plays a variety of functions including determining mood)
• Folate deficiency can cause fatigue and reduce serotonin levels
• Folate has the potential to boost the efficiency of antidepressants
• RDA: 400mcg per day for adults

ACTIONS TO TAKE:

• Add Fresh Spinach to Your Morning Omelet. ½ cup Spinach provides 131mcg of Folate.
• Top Your Turkey Sandwich with Avocado or Dip Fresh Vegetables in Guacamole for a Snack. ½ cup Avocado Provides 59mcg of Folate
• Need a Side Dish Idea?! How about a Warm Brussels Sprouts Salad or Roasted Asparagus to Provide About 80mcg of Folate!
• Fill Up on Folate and Protein by Warming Up Black-Eyed Peas. ½ cup Packs 105mcg of Folate!!

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12 Foods to Buy Organic

….and 15 that aren’t worth it.

 

There’s no denying the currently occurring organic food craze. With our country’s push on healthy living, many of us strive to be as healthy as can be, and many of us believe this quest involves purchasing all natural  and organic foods, for different reasons. One of these reasons is that we wish to avoid consuming foods treated with pesticides. While consuming organic foods may decrease your consumption of pesticide residues, there is no evidence to support that eating organic decreases cancer risk. In my opinion, getting people to just consume more fruits and vegetables (organic or not) is good enough. However, for those of you who love your organic produce, here are lists of produce which are highest and lowest in pesticide residue:

Highest in Pesticide Residue– “The Dirty Dozen”
1. Cherries
2. Grapes
3. Strawberries
4. Apples
5. Celery
6. Nectarines
7. Pears
8. Spinach
9. Potatoes
10. Bell Peppers
11. Lettuce
12. Peaches

 

Lowest in pesticide reside– “The Clean 15”
1. Mangoes
2. Broccoli
3. Avocados
4. Cabbage
5. Sweet Peas (frozen)
6. Sweet Corn (frozen)
7. Onions
8. Asparagus
9. Papayas
10. Pineapple
11. Bananas
12. Kiwi
13. Eggplant
14. Watermelon
15. Sweet Potato

The purpose of this post isn’t to persuade or dissuade from buying organic; it’s to inform you!

This information was taken from the lecture on cancer in the “Nutritional Aspects of Disease” (NUTR 452) course at Penn State University, Fall 2013.

Women Empowering Women

“There’s a place reserved in Hell for women who don’t help other women.”
–Madeleine Albright

Name-calling, rumor-spreading, and cyber bullying are all things which encompass relational aggression, a special type of aggression which is most often utilized among females. When I see or hear these things, women oppressing women by insulting or intentionally causing emotional damage to each other, I can’t help but cringe. How are we to escape the pressure we put on ourselves to look and be “perfect” if we scrutinize each other so often?

The way I see it, it’s a vicious cycle. One female feels unhappy with herself, so she calls another female “fat,” “ugly,” or a “whore” in order to feel more comfortable with herself. I feel like a lot of females do this, draw negative attention to another female, in order to divert possible negative attention that may come their way. It’s incredibly sad, honestly, that any female should feel so awful about herself that she feels the need to put down another, and what’s even more sad is that the female she puts down often times believes in the unwarranted and hurtful comments that come her way.

What on earth are we doing? All people are incredibly beautiful. Some are scarred, some are hurt, some have been severely affected by adversity, but we are all unique and that is beautiful.

I thought I’d take the time to stress the importance of empowering each other.

First of all, I went for a run the other day in downtown State College, and I saw this written on the sidewalk: Why don’t we see this everywhere? Why aren’t messages like this all over social media? Why is it so acceptable and natural to call someone a whore or a slut, but it’s almost uncomfortable or unheard of to say “You are beautiful”? Why is a female considered conceited if she says, “I am beautiful,” or walks around with her head held high?

Ladies, we need to empower each other. Lift your head up and smile, and if you see a girl with her head down, or if you sense a girl feels as if she isn’t worthy or good enough, let her know otherwise!

I follow a ton of people on Twitter with mindsets similar to my own, and I noticed that one of the women I follow just made a blog post which mentioned her previous struggle with an eating disorder. At first I thought, “Oh, sweet! Another recovery story!” But what made this one special is that this woman is a social worker, and she shared her struggle for the first time on her blog.

(You can view it here:  progressnotperfection.co.uk )

After posting her blog, she tweeted this:
Shared blog on Facebook for the very first time! If it makes just one person more aware it’s worth it #recovery #openness #beingreal

This is the mentality that we need– that sharing our stories and our wisdom is worth it if we can positively affect just one person by it

Nutrition and the Community

So this week, I worked in Penn State’s foods lab for “Cook Like a Chef” camp, in which kids aged 11-13 (mostly scholarship kids– their household income needs to be below a certain amount) learn the basics of cooking from the basics of all the food groups– grains, fruits and veggies, fat, protein, and dairy. 

PSU nutrition students (such as yours truly) got to begin the lessons with brief power point presentations on the food group(s) of the day. Following this, the kids usually did some sort of taste testing (of different breads, oils, unusual vegetables, milk & milk alternatives, etc). Most of the lesson was the actual cooking portion.

At the end of each day of camp, all of the food was placed in the front of the room, buffet-style, and the kids got to eat all of the creations that they made. There was always leftovers to take home. 

The purpose of the camp is to teach younger individuals (who are starting to make their own decisions regarding food) how to cook food and have fun doing it so that they may use the skills learned to be better informed consumers, and go home and have their parents follow suit. The kids always leave fed and eager to show their parents the creations they made. 

Today was the final day of camp and we had a reception to which all the kids’ families were invited. I was eager to meet the one boy’s mom because he was a 12-year-old boy who was absolutely considerate and overall just a total sweetheart, something you don’t come around that often. I commended his mom for raising such a great kid.

At the end of the reception, each of the kids got their own individual awards. Even the ones who had the mentality that they were “too cool” for the camp had smiles on their faces when they got their awards. Of course, being an oversensitive female, this made me want to cry.

Some of these kids come from homes or environments in which they are told or treated like they won’t amount to anything, or they are ignored or get very little praise or recognition. These are the kids who grow up feeling like they can’t do anything great, but in an environment such as this cooking camp, they’re part of a group, they accomplish things, and are rewarded in the end.

When I was younger and still deciding on what I wanted to do with my life career-wise, I knew one thing: I wanted to help people. Whether its being a teacher, a doctor, or a counselor, I just wanted to help. After being fascinated with weight-loss and overcoming an eating disorder, I realized that I could study nutrition and help people, whether its helping people reach their weight loss goals, counseling eating disorder patients on how to nourish their bodies again, or teaching kids how to cook and feel good about themselves. I absolutely love every part of it.

Have a lovely day everyone! Wishing you health & happiness!
Love,
Marilee

P.S. I took this photo this week during camp, this quotation was written on the wall of the HUB parking deck at Penn State